The End

My dear friends, family, or random reader,

I am writing to tell you this is my very last post! Not that this warrants streamers or a cake or tears, but it is a decision I have come to. It has to do with something that is weighing on my heart.

I've seen lots of posts or links on facebook lately about "living in the moment" or "not instagraming your life'. They talked a lot about not comparing your life to others. I am terribly guilty of this. Then tonight I read about my friends who are doing a media fast, taking a break from all media, including Facebook, TV, and texting. It convicted me to take up a media fast of my own! I don't want to become a person who is completely obsessed and overtaken by social media.

I got rid of my smartphone for this reason. I was starting to become one of those people that bug me. The people that are always one the phone when they are with their friends, constantly checking this or that, letting everyone know everything that is going on in their life, not being "in the moment".

Blogging has burdened me in a similar way. I have thoroughly enjoyed it and have loved keeping family and friends updated on my post college life, especially since I live so far from so many of these loved ones. But lately it has become a source of stress for myself. I read other friend's blogs and feel cruddy because I don't write as well as them, or because my life is not as exciting as them, or because not as many people care or read it. I realize these are all silly and vain things, but these are the feelings I have developed and they need to stop. They are causing me to sin and I need to get rid of those weeds! God has laid this heavily on my heart.

This is not a condemnation on those who are using social media or who have blogs or anything along those lines! Many use them in the most positive ways. This is my own person experience and feelings and thus have led me to my decision. (Woo...so serious sounding, sorry!) 

So to all of you who have read and have encouraged, cared, and loved me through this blog, I SO appreciate it! Your prayers are still coveted as I figure out this crazy life that God has set before me.

Nicole

A Hard Day's Work

Whenever someone asks about my job, I am eager to tell them about my students, my fellow teachers, my principal, and the entire community! I have been blessed with the most amazing teaching job. I could brag about them all for hours! This you have heard from me before! But I have realized that I have something that really bugs me when it comes to people asking about my job. It happens when they ask this question:

"How many students do you have?"

I have to physically restrain myself from freaking out when they ask. I teach five students. Yes, five. I know, it is an extremely small amount of students. I teach at a very small Christian school. I am so proud to teach there and so proud to teach those five fantastic students! That's not the problem.

The problem is people's response to my answer. I get a very surprised "Oh, wow!" and often times followed up with a joke about how easy I must have it or how I must just get to sit back and relax or how do I even have a job?

Yes, teaching 5 students is much easier than teaching 20! I will not deny that for even a second. But please, please do not think that I don't work hard at my job.

Because I teach at a Christian school, I hold a special responsibility. Parents who send their students to Christian schools are willingly paying a whole lot more money for their students' education. Many families sacrifice so, so much to be able to afford it. My parents did! This being said, these parents and students deserve to get the best education they can. It is my responsibility as the teacher to challenge myself to deliver just that each and every day. And with five students, I am able to teach to each of my students and meet their individual needs. We are able to do projects and activities in the classroom that would not be possible with a larger class. I push myself to be constantly thinking about new ideas, projects, and lessons because I am able to with my small group of pupils.

I am still a second year teacher. I still have my struggles and I still fall short. I am still learning. But I am working hard each day to become better and to teach my heart out to my amazing five students.

What to do, what to do....

The other day my lovely roommate and dear friend got asked this question:

"What are you going to do with Nicole?"

A very good question! It got me to thinking...what AM I going to do once Julia gets married? I decided to make a list of my options. A lot of people seem very curious, so I am laying it all out there for opinion! Feel free to add ideas if you have an good ones! I am open to suggestions.

Here they are! In no particular order: 

1. Move into the basement of our current house and become a personal maid/chef for Julia and Peter. I really enjoy cooking and cleaning AND I wouldn't have to move. Double win! What newlyweds wouldn't want their friend living in the same house as them??

2.  Become a cat lady. My sister and I already have a plan in place. In fact, she currently has 2 cats! Purrrrrrrfect :) 

3.  Take up residence in my classroom. My students already think I live at school, so why not make it official? I can totally hide a futon somewhere. Plus it makes for a super convenient commute! I could literally live and breathe work.


4. Go and snag me a feller so I can get hitched. Random guy off the street? Sure! As long as he fits the requirements. I would hate to still be single when I turn 24. The horror! (Just don't tell my Grandma. She specifically told me not to grab a guy off the street.)

5. Simply crawl into a hole somewhere. I obviously will not be able to face life without my dear roommate. Independence? Ick.  If you need me after July, I'll be crying my eyes out somewhere.

That's my list thus far! I'm really working on keeping my options open, as you can see by the wide variety. I'm feeling pretty good about these choices! Only 2 more months to narrow it down...what am I ever going to do??
 

Those awkward middle school years...

This past weekend my cousin and roommate, Ryan and Julia, held a lock in at their school for their middle school students. So, of course, who did they sign up to help chaperone? Me! So lovely of them. But I was excited! I love hanging out with kids, which is good because otherwise I should really into another profession. It was also fun because Julia, Ryan, and I actually went to middle school together and were in a lock in together in 5th grade. We've come full circle, awwww! :)
What made me nervous was when they asked me to give my testimony to the students.

Annnnd cue my stomach sinking to my feet. I talk in front of people all the time and I enjoy talking to people, but in front of all these kids? Like a formal/serious talk? And what would make my testimony anything special for them?

I couldn't not do it. I needed to. I thought back to when I was in middle school for some perspective on what I would want to hear from someone and it jogged up some not so great memories.

My middle school and early high school experience was not enjoyable. I was a unique and weird kid. I got teased, picked on, and left out on a daily basis. There were days I had to try my hardest to keep it together and then go home crying. I would walk into conversations where people were talking about me, read notes where people were discussing my actions, or even run into a group of people that were planning sleepovers or a get together where I was purposely being avoided and left out. There were pranks pulled on me that bring back tears to my eyes still today.

It's easy to say middle school was not my favorite time in life.

So that is what I talked about to those students. But more importantly I talked to them about how I was able to trust God and get through it all. I trusted He had a plan and a path for me. Then He sent me to Dordt College. The most fantastic years of my life! I made the most amazing friends and had the BEST time! I felt like I finally found where I belonged, people who loved the weird, crazy, unique me for being just that! It was the best. I was also able to mend a lot of those broken relationships from middle/high school and become great friends again. I have continued to trust God since then and He has blessed me for than I could even imagine, eventually sending me to Pittsburgh where I have been overwhelmingly blessed again! God's plans are better than we could ever imagine.

I ended with that and hoped and prayed that even if it was a message that only person listened to and took to heart, that God could use it for good.

When I finished, a girl came up to me with a question. She asked me how long it took me for forgive those who picked on me. I talked about it with her and my heart broke, because clearly she was asking for a reason. I discussed it with her and was thankful that God used my message for someone that needed it. The best part of it all of this though? This adorable 7th grade boy was waiting right behind this girl, ran up to me and said, "Yay for being weird!" gave me a high five, and then ran off. The best thing ever! Yay for being weird! And yay for growing up since middle school and for God being an awesome God and helping me to grow and change since those years and enabling me to learn from all those experiences. Would I ever want to go back? Absolutely not. But I can look back and realize God had a purpose for it all and a purpose for everything in life. A lesson not easily learned but very much worth learning.

10 years

This past year I have joined a women's Bible study, which has been a HUGE blessing in my life, I can't even begin to tell you. 2 months ago, at one of our meetings, one of the women asked the question:

"Where do you hope to be in 10 years?" 

Most of the ladies got a smile on their face and shared their hopes for their spouse, children, and aspiration for their careers. They went around the circle and I became more and more nervous as they got closer to me.

Where DO I want to be in 10 years? I'm not even sure where I'm going to be in 1 year! I mean, no one really knows the plan for their life. Clearly, God has our lives planned according to His will, but most of the women could give a rough estimate of what their life may be like.

Me? Not even a clue. What was my answer, you ask? It was a nervous sputter, something along the lines of, "I guess it would be nice to married!" I revert to humor when I get a bit flustered.

This question and some events in the past few weeks have really gotten me thinking about my future. I have absolutely no idea what is in store for me or where my life may be heading. This is equally terrifying and invigorating!

I have been a nervous wreck the past few weeks, dealing with things to do with the next year of my life. My fingers are chewed to bits...a terrible nervous habit of mine! Sorry, gross confession! The past few days, however, have been a reassurance for me about how phenomenal God truly is. He has shown to me His love and care for me through various means, be it a text from a friend, a sermon that was a spot on message, a phone call of amazing encouragement from another friend, and kind words from coworkers.

I share all this because I can feel God working in me, changing me, and pushing me to be better, to trust Him, and to not be scared of what the future holds, because He is holding it! I cannot tell you how fantastic I feel today, as if a weight has been lifted. Am I still a bit scared/nervous about change? Absolutely. I'm working on it though, with Christ right by my side.

So I am not worrying about 10 years from now. I am working on lesson plans for this week, hanging out with my roommate, and enjoying the beautiful sunset in the sky, placed there by our amazing God! 

Miss Ongna, the Hippo Hunter

Can I take a moment to brag a little? I have been bragging to my fellow teachers and my roommate, so why not just keep it going a bit and brag to you too!

My students finished up their 5 paragraph "essays" on Friday! 5 paragraphs! With indentation, proper punctuation, and introductory and concluding paragraphs. As they were writing and I was helping them edit, I was geeking out. I'm pretty sure they thought I was having a spazz attack because all I could keep saying was, "I am so excited!! You are doing so well! This is awesome!" There may have also been some excited hand motions in there...

The wonderful essays my students wrote!

I have worked on hitting writing hard this year because I think it is a completed neglected skill in today's world. 2nd grade is such a wonderful year because kids are just starting to be able to work on their own and are making that transition from learning to read to reading to learn. I look for ways to include a writing project in each of my subject areas.
My students this year have surprised me at how they have taken a project I have had in mind and done it 10 times better than I was anticipating, such as the essays! It is fun to get to see students develop through the year and go from barely being able to write 1 paragraph to writing multiple. I would also like to add on that these students' abilities to write so well comes not from me being a great teacher, but from them having a wonderful God-given gift to learn and show what they have learned in a most marvelous way! I am in no way bragging about my own abilities, only about my students'!

We have not only done more structured writing in school, but have done some fun writing times as well. I have this wonderful book that has the beginning of a silly story and the students need to finish it. My students love them and break out into cheers when I hand one out. The kids can spend 10 minutes writing and fill up the front and back of the paper. No complaints about that here! Here is a story one of my students wrote that even included me as a character. I guess that's the risk you run teaching young students...being included in a story as a hippo hunter! I think that may actually be illegal in real life...

Either way, this story started out with a boy and his family having problems with hippopotamuses in their house and the students takes it from there:

"One day a girl named Miss Ongna rang the doorbell. She said, "I'm here to destroy or get rid of that hippopotamus!" She went to the trap and took out some bait for it. Then snap! She was in the hippo's tummy. She went bang bang with her fists and gum trapped her. "No!" said Kirk. So Kirk got a fishing rod and for Miss Ongna out. The hippos then said goodbye and Miss Ongna was homeless, so she lived with the 2nd graders and they lived happily ever after! The End."

Back to the grind!

Routine is what most people thrive on, especially kids, most especially me! Don't get me wrong, I love the holidays, fun random events, and other rather interrupted and spontaneous things, but when it comes down to the day-to-day, I LOVE me some routine!

When January rolls around, I know that I am ready after the craziness of the holidays to get back to the normal routine of school. We've been in school for a bit already and have been cruising on! So much has happened already! I also discovered some pictures from before Christmas too. I'll be giving you an update through all my pictures I came upon.

 

For a lesson on evaporation, I had my students "paint" my chalkboard. By paint I mean use water with paint brushes! After I explained the activity, the students looked at me, shocked, and said, "Really?!" We discussed and observed and learned all about evaporation! 

On this day, I snagged some laptops and got my students working on a website, scholastic.com. This website has TONS of resources for teachers, students, and parents. I found a cool little program called "Story Starters" that has fun little prompts to making your own story. A great way for the students to have fun writing and work on using a computer! 

These two pictures are from our class Christmas party. Look at all that red and green! So adorable! For my students' presents this past year, I made them letter pillows again, the first letter of their first name. They are also holding the sock snowmen they made that day! They were super cute. Such a fun time of the year!

These next three pictures are from a science lesson on the moon's phases. I snagged the idea from the 5th/6th grade teacher at my school who posted it on Facebook after finding the idea on the internet. The students carved the various phases into oreos, then labeled them and put their "moons" into the correct order. We resisted and only ate a few of our leftovers! A yummy science lesson!

I was talking with a coworker the other day and said to her, "Teaching is the only profession that you can dress up looking absolutely ridiculous and crazy and people will tell you you are awesome at your job!" On this day our school had tropical day...in the middle of January. We dressed up in our warm weather gear and pretended we were near a beach!

 

Speaking of dressing up all crazy like, here is another picture! Last week we hit a milestone, 90 days completed in school--half way through! In 2nd grade, we celebrated by dressing up in halves, naturally. I had waaaaay too much fun with this! My students also greatly enjoyed it. Lots of PJ's! We had some snacks, watched some Magic School Bus, and enjoyed walking around school in our crazy outfits! I also decorated our door with streamers, which you can see in the background. Who doesn't love running through streamers every time they walk through a door?!

 

A sister from anotha motha!

Happiest New Year to you! I have spent my first few days of 2013 flying back to Pittsburgh, having my car not start, thus scrambling to school in my cousin's car, all to get to school, late nonetheless, to whirl around all day to try and remember where we left off and clean up all the remnants of Christmas. My stuff is thrown all over my house and I whipped up a can of tomato soup this morning for lunch at school today, seeing as there is no other food in the house other than frozen fish and a few dozen cans of black beans.

As you can see, I am off to a great start in 2013! If someone knows how to be better at this life stuff, please come and give me a personal tutorial.

In other, happier news, I had the most fantastic of breaks. One of the reasons for this and why I always love coming home is because of my dear friend, Kimberly Ingelse.

I'll give you a brief history lesson: Kim and I have been friends for literally our entire lives. I don't remember not knowing her. We grew up going to the same church and school, and, fun fact, we are also 3rd cousins! Our families are also good friends with each other. I have frequented the Voskuil household quite often throughout the years and continue to do so, even though their kids have left! Hope you don't mind Tim and Tammy!

Anywho, Kim and I have gone through grade school, the awkward middle school years, and high school together, sharing tons of crazy and ridiculous memories. Once college came and we started to go to different schools in different states, we always remained good friends and have continued to do so though we've been separated by hundreds of miles the past 6 years.

Each time I come home we always get together as much as we can and it as though we haven't been apart. We go shopping, craft, watch movies, eat junk good, and drink wine. We also laugh--a lot. We know just what joke or movie quote will get the other going. We also poke fun of each other for everything! She is one of those amazing people that can simply make you happy just by being around her. She is so dedicated to her family and friends and is truly such a caring and loving person. Kim is also hilarious. A pretty stellar combination if you ask me!

It is not lost on me how huge of a blessing it is to have a friend that I have known my entire life and that I can continue to be so close with, even when distant from each other location wise. She has gotten me though some tough times and I cannot imagine my life without her in it.  I'll get random texts from her with a simple quote or a voicemail with a hilarious story on it, either of which can just make my day. Kim is a best friend and really, another sister to me. I love her dearly and I am so thankful for our awesome friendship!